Interesting things I have learned from watching (too much) Treehouse TV

  • Chuggington is NOT the red train. He’s not even a train at all. I thought it was like Thomas, and the show was named after the one train in particular. But Chuggington is actually the name of the train STATION … I think.
  • The birds on 3rd and Bird make me wish my baby was British. Their accents are delightful, and I find myself singing “Do the Muffin” and “It’s Baby Jordan” on a daily basis, just because I like to “sing British.”
  • Guess with Jess? It’s just a cheap imitation of Blue’s Clues. Where is Steve? He was cute in a goofy way. I seriously used to have a crush on him. Now there’s just a stupid animated cat, and I always find myself looking at Baby Boy and saying, “‘Allo!” in his stupid Cockney accent.
  • The voice of Ruby on Max & Ruby is actually Pam from The Office. What? It’s not??? But seriously, it must be. It’s got to be!
  • The commercials for The Cat in the Hat Knows a Lot About That bug me. REALLY bug me. I don’t want to dilly OR dally with friends Nick and Sally and their “thinga-ma-jigger.” How is it possible that I love Dr. Seuss books but want to down a whole bottle of Advil when I hear this commercial?
  • Caillou might be whiny, but his parents are cool. I get them. They are tough but fair, and always so pleasant. I want to be Caillou’s mom … minus the baggy green sweatshirt. I don’t think I’ve worn a sweatshirt since 2001.
  • I watched Roary the Racecar only once, but I’m sure it featured a lazy mechanic guy in a shed who was very happy to have the day off, and he may have been intoxicated. Weird show.
  • I like you, Emily Yeung. You sometimes visit places I know in Canada, and I like that. You do fun things, and you ramble on-camera, and it’s funny because you’re just a kid so they don’t cut you off, and I’m like, Oh, Emily!
  • Waybuloo is just Tellatubbies. They make the same creepy “Ooooohhahhhhhh” noises and run around with their arms in the air, and stuff lights up, and mushrooms cry, and kids pretend to see stuff that isn’t there. Tellatubbies did not deserve to be re-made.
  • I am eerily entranced by 4 Square. I know the movement segment guys have socks stuffed in their unitards. I know the cross-eyed puppets in the singing segment look like they’re on LSD. I know the chick reciting the stories is a whackjob. But damnit, I like it! And Baby Boy does, too. We hear the music and both run for the TV. We follow along with Captain Hupette religiously. It is some kind of government plot, possibly.

So what do you think?

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