Weekly re-cap

Posted on October 27, 2009 by

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(Oct. 19 to Oct. 25)

Symptoms: Nauseous, exhausted, peed a lot — this was the first week I noticed that, and it’s gotten to the point where I have to get up to pee at least once throughout the night, which I never did before.

Body changes: Boobs can only fit into one of my bras (and they actually prevented me from wearing a favourite dress). Stomach is either still bloated or starting to pop, because I wore my new belly band twice (once with dress pants, once with jeans).

Cravings: Sour cream and onion chips

Loved chowing down on: Works pizza, cheeseburgers and fries (it was a junky week)

Could not stomach: Mayonnaise (or the thought of any sandwiches or wraps)

High point: Once again, it was my wonderful, sweet Darling Husband taking over the cleaning and cooking duties. He has been amazing. I hope I really do get my energy back in the second trimester, so I can help him out a bit.

Low point: Going to bed really early — like 8:30 p.m., people — but still waking up feeling so exhausted I want to cry.

Paranoid moment of the week: Ordering a Fresca in Wendy’s (on the aforementioned cheeseburger run) and then only drinking two sips before tossing it, because I wasn’t sure if it contained aspartame.

Weird moment of the week: I find myself automatically trying to “suck in” — especially at work — because I’m just so used to that “shoulders back, stomach tight!” instinct. But my stomach feels most comfortable when I breathe out and don’t try to keep it sucked in. It’s a habit I definitely need to break. Weird, huh?

Flu who?

Posted on October 27, 2009 by

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Tuesday, October 27, 2009
8 weeks, 2 days pregnant

The H1N1 vaccine is finally about to be available in most parts of Canada, and like most preggo peeps, I’m high on the list of people who should get it.
To get scientific for a sec, there are actually two types of vaccines, and preggos get the “unadjuvanted” one.
Pregnant women can literally die from H1N1 — yes, die — because when you’re pregnant, your immune system is already out of whack (i.e. low or something). Pregnant women can also get sicker for longer, and their lung capacity is decreased because of the uterus pushing up the diaphragm.
Yikes!
Experts are saying preggos should get two H1N1 shots, three weeks apart, in order to get “full immunity.” Some articles are saying you should also get one of the regular flu shots, and you can sometimes tack that on at the same time.
And it’s not just us — the people closest to us (i.e. the Darling Husbands of the world) should also be vaccinated. I have never even gotten a flu shot — and neither has he — so this is all very new and strange.
I know it’s important — and I’m going to do it, for the sake of Little Baby — but I can’t help but feel worried about it. I mean, I’m not touching The Drink That Shall Not Be Named, but I’m going to get injected with God knows what?
Other pregnant women are worried, too. In fact, one article says half of the pregnant women surveyed said they won’t touch the vaccine.
Experts can’t confirm that the vaccine is 100% safe, and some people are wondering if the benefits outweigh the risks. I would tell you the risks, at this point in the post, if I wasn’t too terrified to research them.
As worried as I am, reading this quote really confirmed that it’s what I should be doing:

“There have been deaths in perfectly healthy adults. It’s a very sad thing when a perfectly healthy pregnant woman dies of a vaccine-preventable disease … A little shot in the arm versus a visit to the ICU — that’s a no-brainer.”

Doing the panic dance

Posted on October 26, 2009 by

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Monday, October 26, 2009
8 WEEKS, 1 DAY PREGNANT

When I woke up this morning, my first thought was, “I’m two months today!” Eight weeks is the first milestone that feels really impressive, because it’s (technically) two whole months. As in two down, seven to go.
My second thought was: “OMG, is that blood???”
Yes. Panic-time. There was a small amount of brownish stuff — like what you get at the end of your period — on the toilet paper.
I think I almost passed out from shock and panic. Darling Husband had left at the crack of dawn, so I was sobbing alone in the bathroom. Praying for the baby. Freaking out. Running for my copy of What to Expect.
As I frantically looked up “bleeding” in the index, I tried to stay calm. I remembered reading about implantation bleeding, but it was too late for that — wasn’t it? And while I had to admit that a bit of brown stuff was “better” than bright red scary blood, it was still blood.

The book calmed me somewhat, and I forced myself to get dressed and ready for work. I did some major BlackBerry research once I reached the bus stop, Googling “light brown spotting 8 weeks pregnant” and reading thread after thread of women who had gone through the same thing.
The consensus on the internet was a huge comfort, as it seems that brown discharge is fairly common — especially among eight-weekers — and since it’s “old blood” it’s not usually a sign of a problem. It is riskier if the blood is bright red, and if you have cramps as well.
I’m scheduled to see my doctor on Wednesday — and hopefully hear the baby’s heartbeat for the first time — so for now, I’m going to wait it out. It’s still really scary, though.

My Husband Rocks

Posted on October 23, 2009 by

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Dear Darling Husband,

It’s a bit belated, but …

… thanks for knocking me up.

Love, your wife
xoxo

When I am a mother, I hope …

Posted on October 22, 2009 by

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Thursday, October 22, 2009
7 WEEKS, 4 DAYS PREGNANT

When I am a mother, I hope I relax more. Not relax in the day-at-the-spa way, but in the don’t-sweat-the-small-stuff way.

When I am a mother, I hope my top priority stops being my career — and I remember that my career is not going to give me hugs and kisses at the end of the day.
When I am a mother, I hope I start taking field trips to museums and parks and science centres. I want having a child to encourage me to never stop learning — so I can always answer their questions.
When I am a mother, I hope I can hold my temper … as much as possible.
When I am a mother, I hope I remember how scary I used to find The Things Under The Bed and The Monster in The Closet — and patiently check both every night at bedtime.
When I am a mother, I hope I do not fall apart when the house falls apart — and that I can tolerate going to bed with dishes undone, if it means getting extra sleep.
When I am a mother, I hope I can be grateful for the positives … and not obsess over the negatives.
When I am a mother, I hope I am the kind of mom who understands that butter has no place in a peanut-butter sandwich — and never insists “it’s too dry without butter” and slaps it on anyway.
When I am a mother, I hope I can rediscover the magic in the little things — in ice cream for dinner, and going to an amusement park, and finding candy in your coat pocket.
When I am a mother, I hope I do a good job.

I’m Heather Laura Clarke. I’m a writer living in beautiful Nova Scotia, I have a 15-year-old son and a 13-year-old daughter, I married my high school sweetheart, and this is the story of my handmade life.

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