The other night
It came out of nowhere, and now it’s practically all I can think about.
Longtime readers may remember that back before I was pregnant with D — when I was just a mild-mannered reporter, er, producer/project manager, I had this dream of writing and publishing a novel.
I got up early every day before work, so I could spend an hour or an hour and a half writing and editing. I finished my novel. I went to work every day at a job I enjoyed, but one that sometimes left me feeling like I wasn’t writing enough — that I wasn’t using this spark inside of me. I pitched publishers and got rejected again and again.
Then I got pregnant with D, and literally the exact same day I peed on the stick, I stopped. I turned 100 per cent of my energy into preparing for motherhood, and just basically let my dream of being a published author fade away.
I continued to write on a freelance basis, of course, and now I write professionally. It feels amazing! I’m completely grateful and pleased to have this career, and usually very satisfied with my work.
I haven’t thought too much about getting a book in bookstores over the last four (almost FIVE, wow) years of this pregnant / nursing / pregnant / raising two kids whirlwind. Occasionally I feel a pang, and then it goes away … stifled by sippy-cups and Lego and the need to make another batch of pancakes “wif syrups” for the kids.
I’m too damn busy to write another book, I told myself sometimes. I no longer wanted to get the original novel published, because it felt embarrassingly amateur. I thought it was so good at the time, but now … ugh.
But then, the other night, inspiration struck. I was lying in bed, with my mind racing — I totally drank a Diet Coke WITH CAFFEINE earlier in the day, which messes with me big-time — and suddenly I had an idea. Not just a little blib of an idea, but chapter ideas — hell, COMPLETE SENTENCES — were rushing through my bloodstream.
I grabbed the notebook and pen I keep in my nightstand, and discovered almost all of the pages were filled with scribbles of dress ideas, Christmas present lists, and lists of things to organize — I’m the lamest. I found ONE blank page at the end, used my iPhone as a flashlight, and wrote as fast as I could.
My notes — which I will share one day, because they’re hilariously wobbly and confusing — are the basis for the book I’m going to write. You know, like SOON. NOW?
I have such a good feeling about this, guys. I can SEE it on the shelves at Chapters. It’s a very exciting feeling. I haven’t felt like this in years. A book! A chance! Another kick at the old publishing can. It’s like five years ago, again, only … better. I’m more experienced, I’m a better writer — years of writing professionally, hello! — and I feel I have a much stronger concept.
I promise to share more soon, but I just had to tell you I’m going for it again. And this time? I’m not stopping until I take it all the way.
xo
3 Comments on “The other night”
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Heather's Handmade Life 
So exciting, Heather! Good luck. Can't wait to read it one day.
– Ange xoxo
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Whoa! I totally missed this! EXCITING!
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I can't wait to find it on the bookshelves 🙂
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