One is the loneliest most rare number

Since having our second baby, I have realized my (already very limited) alone time is now practically non-existent.

Therefore, I present to you a list of my current favourite places to be:

  • Showering. Sure, the baby is usually in her carseat right there, on the other side of the curtain. But I’m still somewhat alone. And I get to shower all the breastmilk drips and spit-up off my skin, which is always a good thing.
  • Blow-drying my hair. Can’t hear crying, whining, or tantrums, and the warmth gives me a nice sleepy feeling. Also, if I put on My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, there are enough subtitles that I can read what’s happening without having to hear them over the drone of the hairdryer.
  • On the toilet. This does not always happen alone, though, unfortunately. Often D (23 months) is right there, signing “wash hands” and trying to scramble up onto the counter. But when I am alone in the bathroom? It’s the best.
  • In bed (when the babies are not). When Darling Husband is around in the evenings, sometimes I will nurse the baby all evening and then hand her over to him around 10:30 (when she won’t hold another drop of milk). Then he takes her downstairs for a few hours while he watches TV, and I actually get to sleep knowing she is (A) safe (B) two floors away, and (C) not going to wake me up 10 minutes after I fall asleep. Those couple of hours are heavenly!
  • In the van. Sometimes being in the van with both kids is awful, but when they’re both sleeping? Or when C is sleeping and D is engrossed in his portable DVD player a.k.a. The Birthday Gift We Gave Him Two Weeks Early Because He Was Such A Pill In The Car? It’s really nice. Darling Husband and I get to chat. I get to see the outside world. I might even get to see other people, or get a smidge of fresh air!

Upon re-reading this list, I have concluded it is rather depressing. Did I really say the toilet is one of my favourite places to be? Oh dear. I used to be a lady, I swear.

So what do you think?

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