DARLING HUSBAND: Uh, we need to discuss something.
DARLING HUSBAND: You know the shower?
DARLING HUSBAND: There’s a problem in there.
ME: You mean that the drain cover keeps moving around, because you washed the screw down the drain?
DARLING HUSBAND: I did that when I took it apart to unclog YOUR HAIR!
ME: I can’t help that it’s falling out! You should feel bad for me!
DARLING HUSBAND: You really need to stop leaving clumps of hair all over the shower walls.
ME: I can’t help it! I run my fingers through it and it comes out in clumps. And … and I just … I don’t know, it gets on the walls.
DARLING HUSBAND: You need to stop doing that.
ME: I’ll keep my hair off the walls, if you scrub the shower like I’ve been begging you to do.
DARLING HUSBAND: …